Twin's eating disorder means sister goes south alone

Most people have picked up on the Hollywood-Babylon aspect of the story about Mary-Kate Olsen going into treatment for an eating disorder (requisite horrifyingly skinny picture included). But the interesting part of the story for me is the last sentence:

But Ashley Olsen will be making a planned trip later this month to Australia and New Zealand without Mary-Kate to launch overseas promotion of "New York Minute" -- the sisters' first theatrical feature.

So these girls have been joined at the hip for 18 years; suddenly, one goes into rehab, the other goes to New Zealand. Talk about a sudden separation. I wonder what that trip will be like. Will Ashley wind up in Auckland with only half her hair curlers? Will only half of their entourage go on the trip, and if so, won't the half that's left home feel suddenly irrelevant? All kinds of problems like that.

Of course, the weirdest thing is that these chicks have been depicted, for the last 15 years, as paragons of American beauty and perfection. Now the moment they turn 18, they start falling apart. As they age, is there any way they won't turn out to be the most cringingly strange family act since the Jacksons? Let's look at the milestones that await us:

After Mary-Kate gets out of hospital, tearful reunion.

Mary-Kate gets a much-older boyfriend (I'm sure Jack Nicholson would fill the bill); Ashley turns frightenly fundamentalist Christian.

Mary-Kate gets married to Jack Nicholson; Ashley gets married to Michael Jackson.

Jack discovers Mary-Kate is pregnant with Bruce Willis' child

Michael Jackson dies in Neverland conflagration; Ashley assumes control of empire, starts fucking Jack Nicholson.

One month after giving birth to Bruce Willis' child, Mary-Kate goes back into hospital for eating disorder.

Update the next day: Unable to face being separated from her twin, Ashley cancelled the trip south.