Stop the presses

Real men moisturize, chirps a State Department magazine aimed at young men in the Arab world. A conservative, no doubt homophobic, Washington columnist asks:

Does the State Department believe that Arab males -- some of whom do not permit their wives and daughters to go out in public without a male family member as escort, others of whom think nothing of killing a daughter who dishonors the family by fraternizing with a boy -- are going to be impressed with a vision of America in which males are feminized "exfoliated," smooth-skinned eunuchs?

Good question -- and I know just the guy to answer. Mona Charen, meet Jeff Gannon.

And at the WSJ, a columnist says Michael Jackson may be a freak, but he's not the only freak. The whole thing may simply be a message to America -- grow up. The WSJ is very skilled at perceiving messages to America in news stories -- and so am I. The whole Christian proselitizing scandal at the Air Force Academy while the institution struggles simultaneously with multiple rape scandals -- that's a message to America too. Or how about "Job growth slowest since August 2003" -- another message! Or "38 die as Iraq attacks intensify" -- another message! See how it works?

By the way -- misspell NYTimes.com as http://www.nytiems.com/ and you wind up on a site called "Amazing Bible Studies."

Michael Jackson, Jeff Gannon, Mona Charen, Iraq